πŸ“§
Marketing

Best Growth Hacks That Are Just Spam

The tactics everyone uses that nobody actually wants to receive

Growth hacking died the moment it became indistinguishable from harassment.
πŸ‘‘ #1 Pick

Cold Email Blasts via Mailchimp

Send 1,000 semi-personalized emails and hope 0.5% convert

All 5 recommendations

Est. prices as of Mar 13, 2026

#1 Β· Mailchimp Β· Most Overhyped

Cold Email Blasts via Mailchimp

$20/month

Send 1,000 semi-personalized emails and hope 0.5% convert

  • βœ“ Dirt cheap entry point
  • βœ“ Templates make it effortless
  • βœ“ Technically legal if you follow CAN-SPAM
  • βœ— Spam folder placement is guaranteed
  • βœ— Destroys your sender reputation permanently
  • βœ— Converts at <1% because recipients never asked for it
#2 Β· Various (Apollo, Hunter, Instantly)

LinkedIn Connection Spam Bot

$50-150/month

Automate adding 500 strangers weekly with generic 'let's connect' messages

  • βœ“ Automated workflow saves time
  • βœ“ Some people do accept connections
  • βœ“ Easy to scale to absurd numbers
  • βœ— LinkedIn actively bans these accounts
  • βœ— People know it's a bot and ignore follow-ups
  • βœ— Wastes their time and yours
#3 Β· Various (ConvertKit, Unbounce)

Clickbait Landing Page Copy

$99-300/month

'This one weird trick' gets clicks but not customers

  • βœ“ Short-term traffic spike possible
  • βœ“ Low barrier to implementation
  • βœ“ Works on 2% of the internet
  • βœ— Creates trust debt you'll never recover
  • βœ— High bounce rates tank algorithms
  • βœ— First-time visitors never return
#4 Β· ZoomInfo Β· Budget King

Purchased Email Lists from ZoomInfo

$5,000-50,000/year

Pay thousands for emails of people who actively don't want to hear from you

  • βœ“ Massive volume of contacts immediately
  • βœ“ Technically 'B2B compliant'
  • βœ“ Feels like you're doing something
  • βœ— 30-50% of emails bounce or are fake
  • βœ— Recipients never opted in and will report as spam
  • βœ— ROI is consistently negative
#5 Β· Facebook, Google, TikTok Β· Hidden Gem

Aggressive Retargeting Ads (8+ impressions/day)

$500-5,000/month

Follow someone across the internet until they buy or block you

  • βœ“ Actually converts better than cold outreach
  • βœ“ Reaches warm audiences
  • βœ“ Measurable and optimizable
  • βœ— Feels invasive and creepy to most users
  • βœ— Ad fatigue kills performance after 3-4 weeks
  • βœ— Damages brand perception despite conversions